Living

Things have been harder than we expected coming home from the hospital. We weren’t prepared for the feeling that three of us wasn’t enough anymore…that we had morphed into a family of four a long time ago. The void Hannah left in our home is so incredibly palpable. We are struggling to resume life…but it’s a different life than we wanted. We were prepared to go to war with our baby girl. We spent months talking to neurosurgeons, urologists, high-risk OBs and NICU doctors…a large team of specialists ready and willing to go to the mat with us. We were wound tight and ready to spring into action.  And then it all just ended.

She was the little sister I always dreamed about for Ellie. She had my nose, Mike’s mouth and a head full of brown hair. I find myself liking my nose more now because I shared it with her.

We are taking comfort in the fact that the worst day of our lives was cushioned in peace in so many small ways. Hannah is in heaven, free to be the perfect, uninhibited spirit she was always meant to be. We are making plans for her to physically rest near her namesake, Mike’s Grandpa Krantz. We wanted Hannah to share Grandpa’s initials, HFK, as a tribute to his sweet spirit and inspirational memory. We know she did him justice in so many ways.

The outpouring of love and support from all of you is giving us strength enough to keep it together for Eloise. To get through every day.  No one knows what to say. No one knows how to help. But please know how much every note, text, phone call, thought and prayer, as insignificant as it may seem to you, means everything to us.

Since some of you have asked, in lieu of flowers, we thought donations to Lurie Children’s Hospital in Hannah’s name (Hannah Felicity Soares Krantz) would be most appropriate. The Lurie staff and facility gave us endless comfort and hope during the past several months, and it would be such a wonderful tribute to Hannah to offer that to other children and families.

Lurie Children’s Hospital Donation Page